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JOURNAL// "MEDITATIONS"// by Kelly Mason

" I believe that Love is a space shared. A space where there is no fear.

A space that can be shared only equally for it to be called Love."

The intention of these writing and reflections is to find understanding & balance... The middle ground with all on goings.

To find beauty within the pain we all feel and to find non-permanency and within the goodness of living in the blissful moments themselves. Laying emphasis and enhancing the beauty and seeing the beautiful in ugliness.

To spend time with losses and gains, various new and old experiences. These are the results of spending time with the pleasures, the seeking, the times of still sitting, my own and therefor others ignorance and understanding the experience itself, for the sake of itself.

Observing, reflecting and writing as the days and years, even seconds and minutes go by and how my perception also shifts, changes and modifies with each new experience that comes my way.

I have found that my writings and reflecting sometimes takes me to a dreamlike luminescence. This practice allows me to see things from a third party point of view, it helps me to take a step back from the experience itself and into an abstract space.

These reflections, questions, statements & fluctuating mindsets in writings shows me that we ultimately nothing is ours even our opinions and insight and we are ultimately not in control of anything even our own minds.

I see that our perception is inaccurate due to conditioning or our emotions shielding us from the calm and full truth in each event that we are presented.

Unless of course we find ourselves fully in the present in each moment - this ultimately being the only real truth.

The practice of my reflections or these meditations allows me to become the witness more and more throughout my life. The result, i find myself remaining calm in disturbances and stable on shaky ground, responsive and not reactive to my surroundings thus allowing life to go by while i remain grateful and unaffected no matter what comes my way.

Many people have come into my life and touched me deeply, even if only for a glimpse. To teach me, to show me, to allow me to experience a unique new experience each time.

So this is some of my experiences in abstract form through reflections, questions, contemplation and statements at the times of the events as they occurred...

Complied writings for the sake of themselves...

"Smile, Love & be free. All my favourite things, the best way to be."

"Life is a beautiful struggle so let it be just that. A struggle that is beautiful."

"I like the pain equally to the pleasure, for i know and understanding that they come together."

"Leave your judgement for judgement day when you will see that the judgement was never in your hands"

"Comfortable with yourself - you then should be comfortable with me. Feel good about yourself - you should then feel good about me. Feel good about your actions - my actions will not effect you."

"Know yourself and know all that is me. If you let you be you fully you will allow me to express myself totally."

"Lead with Peace in mind at all times. Allow it to bring gentleness and understanding into all aspects of your living."

"You cannot control or change someone else's actions or perceptions so do you. And do you well"

"No judgement of self no judgement of me."

"When you cannot truly see me, when you cannot truly listen to me you will never know what kind of person that I can be."

"Know these were my choices and these choices make me me."

"Do you hide parts of yourself from yourself?"

"My love for you was instant, the moment that I saw you I knew"

"You are my light when I am feeling blue, each day goes by with you in seconds , time seems to fly by when we are together."

"You used to need me, you used to want me. You used to care, you used to love, I used to be the only one in your eyes, the only one you saw. "

"Forget the day, forget your mind. Its as if nothing really matters at all."

"Openness is keeping my mind and heart available for new experiences, ideas, interactions, view points and relationships. Its me working towards moving beyond my boundaries.

Openness is new discovery.

When i am open i notice that life is presenting me with new opportunities and growth.

I remind myself being open is a gift, a practice, a quality to receive."

"All you have to do is let go. We have to learn how it feels to completely let go"

"Tune out & tune in. Focus for me is being completely absorbed by the task at hand. I am to be focused in all that i do. This is my Karma as good work is worth doing well."

"Sometimes take a break, stop trying to complicate & control everything. Stop trying to find all the answers, all the explanations, all the facts, all the theories.

Enjoy now, enjoy living, enjoy presence."

"In order to reach a state of Yoga one must develop both practice and dis-attachment. Practice ultimately gets you to reach, not being attached to reaching your goal allows you to move further on your path."

"Smile, Love & be free. All my favourite things, the best way to be."

"I appreciate that you give everything that you have to offer - I want you to know everything that you have given to me i have felt every drop."

"Once i opened my eyes everything was more enhanced, almost dream like. Not only love, not only happiness & fulfilment but also the fear, the sadness, and the emptiness."

"Let me be the one who is there for you. To know that all i offer you is True."

"Who are you trying to hide yourself from, for subtitles may not be seen but can be felt."

"Striving for success without the hard work is like harvesting without having planted any seeds. While striving focus on what could go right and not be distracted by what could go wrong."

"Always strive to do better, be better, learn more, see more, experience more."

"Do you know how it feels to be alone? Do you think that you could handle it?"

"My intention is to get you out of your minds and into your bodies, your subtleties, your sensations & feelings. To get you to communicate with your inner voice. Beyond your minds, beyond your egos, to your truth."

"When I was a child I thought it would all be so simple. I always thought that when I grew up I would be untouchable."

"Sometimes I don't like that I care so much."

"I want you to feel the pain, the pain of loosing one you Love. Its necessary to appreciate having them as long as you did."

"Its all about you and nothing else matters."

"Shed what you no longer require, shed what no longer serves you. She the weights and the worries and become light once again."

"Its you with the power, it is you that wears the crown."

"At times I have wondered if you can help someone from themselves. If you could change or shift their way of thinking. How they perceived and digested the world around them. Try to make them understand. "

" Disregard me, as if you didn't ever know me."

"Dedicate yourself to your passion, dedicate yourself fully to who you want to be."

"She once was beautiful until she was bruised. She lost faith in Love and became fearful, but she grew out of this and became a Lotus of life."

"Take comfort in yourself. Cradle, support, understand and be with your emotions. Give yourself what you require. Watch your subtleties, get to know them. At anytime know you can take retreat in all that is you."

"Don't let me down."

"Tell me Nature, Why are you so beautiful?"

"Be gentle, you never know it might suit you. To be gentle, to be soft, to be vulnerable, to be willing to be passive is qualities of the feminine. Effective effortlessness shines forth. So at times, when it calls for it, be gentle be feminine."

"I thought that I knew myself so well, but it seems I know myself not at all."

"All the shedding, shifting, changing, growing... If only I had been watching more closely."

" Love is an emotion not to be played with."

"You should instantly feel that it is love."

" I believe that Love is a space shared. A space where there is no fear, a space that can be shared only equally for it to be called love."

"If it was me that was to come to your rescue know that i would have always done my very best.

But that's not how things go, rescue yourself, see that's its you that's put to the test."

"Do I love myself, the way that I would love another? Do I trust myself, the way I would show trust to another? Can i be alone and feel secure, as secure as when I find myself with you? Can I answer these questions truthfully?

Do I promise to never leave myself, turn my back on myself, the same that I would ask of you? Will I stand by myself, in the way I hope you would stand by me too? Am I faithful to myself, like i would ask for your faith in me?

Answer me these questions, I want to see if I can."

"We are all just one of a kind. Exactly that, JUST one of a kind. The same, all the same, that we are all unique."

"Cant you take me away, to the place that I want to be? To the place where I can be me."

"Could we maybe do things differently, Could we go back in time? Maybe its the beginning of the end again. Something now broken that we cannot mend. Can we pretend? Hide the bad things that happened... Can you start seeing the pattern? Why is it we don't know which way to go?

One of us should surely know."

"The first time we met there was no other, the first time we kissed this was confirmed."

"When a women loves a man she will do all that she can. She will heal him when he is broken, she will adapt herself and move with his motion.

She will give space to him so he feels safe to open and show his emotion.

She will be a shoulder for his tears and stand by him th