JOURNAL// "MEDITATIONS"// by Kelly Mason

" I believe that Love is a space shared. A space where there is no fear.

A space that can be shared only equally for it to be called Love."

The intention of these writing and reflections is to find understanding & balance... The middle ground with all on goings.

To find beauty within the pain we all feel and to find non-permanency and within the goodness of living in the blissful moments themselves. Laying emphasis and enhancing the beauty and seeing the beautiful in ugliness.

To spend time with losses and gains, various new and old experiences. These are the results of spending time with the pleasures, the seeking, the times of still sitting, my own and therefor others ignorance and understanding the experience itself, for the sake of itself.

Observing, reflecting and writing as the days and years, even seconds and minutes go by and how my perception also shifts, changes and modifies with each new experience that comes my way.

I have found that my writings and reflecting sometimes takes me to a dreamlike luminescence. This practice allows me to see things from a third party point of view, it helps me to take a step back from the experience itself and into an abstract space.

These reflections, questions, statements & fluctuating mindsets in writings shows me that we ultimately nothing is ours even our opinions and insight and we are ultimately not in control of anything even our own minds.

I see that our perception is inaccurate due to conditioning or our emotions shielding us from the calm and full truth in each event that we are presented.

Unless of course we find ourselves fully in the present in each moment - this ultimately being the only real truth.

The practice of my reflections or these meditations allows me to become the witness more and more throughout my life. The result, i find myself remaining calm in disturbances and stable on shaky ground, responsive and not reactive to my surroundings thus allowing life to go by while i remain grateful and unaffected no matter what comes my way.

Many people have come into my life and touched me deeply, even if only for a glimpse. To teach me, to show me, to allow me to experience a unique new experience each time.

So this is some of my experiences in abstract form through reflections, questions, contemplation and statements at the times of the events as they occurred...

Complied writings for the sake of themselves...

"Smile, Love & be free. All my favourite things, the best way to be."

"Life is a beautiful struggle so let it be just that. A struggle that is beautiful."

"I like the pain equally to the pleasure, for i know and understanding that they come together."

"Leave your judgement for judgement day when you will see that the judgement was never in your hands"

"Comfortable with yourself - you then should be comfortable with me. Feel good about yourself - you should then feel good about me. Feel good about your actions - my actions will not effect you."

"Know yourself and know all that is me. If you let you be you fully you will allow me to express myself totally."

"Lead with Peace in mind at all times. Allow it to bring gentleness and understanding into all aspects of your living."

"You cannot control or change someone else's actions or perceptions so do you. And do you well"

"No judgement of self no judgement of me."

"When you cannot truly see me, when you cannot truly listen to me you will never know what kind of person that I can be."

"Know these were my choices and these choices make me me."

"Do you hide parts of yourself from yourself?"

"My love for you was instant, the moment that I saw you I knew"

"You are my light when I am feeling blue, each day goes by with you in seconds , time seems to fly by when we are together."

"You used to need me, you used to want me. You used to care, you used to love, I used to be the only one in your eyes, the only one you saw. "

"Forget the day, forget your mind. Its as if nothing really matters at all."

"Openness is keeping my mind and heart available for new experiences, ideas, interactions, view points and relationships. Its me working towards moving beyond my boundaries.

Openness is new discovery.

When i am open i notice that life is presenting me with new opportunities and growth.

I remind myself being open is a gift, a practice, a quality to receive."

"All you have to do is let go. We have to learn how it feels to completely let go"

"Tune out & tune in. Focus for me is being completely absorbed by the task at hand. I am to be focused in all that i do. This is my Karma as good work is worth doing well."

"Sometimes take a break, stop trying to complicate & control everything. Stop trying to find all the answers, all the explanations, all the facts, all the theories.

Enjoy now, enjoy living, enjoy presence."

"In order to reach a state of Yoga one must develop both practice and dis-attachment. Practice ultimately gets you to reach, not being attached to reaching your goal allows you to move further on your path."

"Smile, Love & be free. All my favourite things, the best way to be."

"I appreciate that you give everything that you have to offer - I want you to know everything that you have given to me i have felt every drop."

"Once i opened my eyes everything was more enhanced, almost dream like. Not only love, not only happiness & fulfilment but also the fear, the sadness, and the emptiness."

"Let me be the one who is there for you. To know that all i offer you is True."

"Who are you trying to hide yourself from, for subtitles may not be seen but can be felt."

"Striving for success without the hard work is like harvesting without having planted any seeds. While striving focus on what could go right and not be distracted by what could go wrong."

"Always strive to do better, be better, learn more, see more, experience more."

"Do you know how it feels to be alone? Do you think that you could handle it?"

"My intention is to get you out of your minds and into your bodies, your subtleties, your sensations & feelings. To get you to communicate with your inner voice. Beyond your minds, beyond your egos, to your truth."

"When I was a child I thought it would all be so simple. I always thought that when I grew up I would be untouchable."

"Sometimes I don't like that I care so much."

"I want you to feel the pain, the pain of loosing one you Love. Its necessary to appreciate having them as long as you did."

"Its all about you and nothing else matters."

"Shed what you no longer require, shed what no longer serves you. She the weights and the worries and become light once again."

"Its you with the power, it is you that wears the crown."

"At times I have wondered if you can help someone from themselves. If you could change or shift their way of thinking. How they perceived and digested the world around them. Try to make them understand. "

" Disregard me, as if you didn't ever know me."

"Dedicate yourself to your passion, dedicate yourself fully to who you want to be."

"She once was beautiful until she was bruised. She lost faith in Love and became fearful, but she grew out of this and became a Lotus of life."

"Take comfort in yourself. Cradle, support, understand and be with your emotions. Give yourself what you require. Watch your subtleties, get to know them. At anytime know you can take retreat in all that is you."

"Don't let me down."

"Tell me Nature, Why are you so beautiful?"

"Be gentle, you never know it might suit you. To be gentle, to be soft, to be vulnerable, to be willing to be passive is qualities of the feminine. Effective effortlessness shines forth. So at times, when it calls for it, be gentle be feminine."

"I thought that I knew myself so well, but it seems I know myself not at all."

"All the shedding, shifting, changing, growing... If only I had been watching more closely."

" Love is an emotion not to be played with."

"You should instantly feel that it is love."

" I believe that Love is a space shared. A space where there is no fear, a space that can be shared only equally for it to be called love."

"If it was me that was to come to your rescue know that i would have always done my very best.

But that's not how things go, rescue yourself, see that's its you that's put to the test."

"Do I love myself, the way that I would love another? Do I trust myself, the way I would show trust to another? Can i be alone and feel secure, as secure as when I find myself with you? Can I answer these questions truthfully?

Do I promise to never leave myself, turn my back on myself, the same that I would ask of you? Will I stand by myself, in the way I hope you would stand by me too? Am I faithful to myself, like i would ask for your faith in me?

Answer me these questions, I want to see if I can."

"We are all just one of a kind. Exactly that, JUST one of a kind. The same, all the same, that we are all unique."

"Cant you take me away, to the place that I want to be? To the place where I can be me."

"Could we maybe do things differently, Could we go back in time? Maybe its the beginning of the end again. Something now broken that we cannot mend. Can we pretend? Hide the bad things that happened... Can you start seeing the pattern? Why is it we don't know which way to go?

One of us should surely know."

"The first time we met there was no other, the first time we kissed this was confirmed."

"When a women loves a man she will do all that she can. She will heal him when he is broken, she will adapt herself and move with his motion.

She will give space to him so he feels safe to open and show his emotion.

She will be a shoulder for his tears and stand by him through his years."

"Trust me as if I were your own eyes, know me as well as you know yourself, feel me like the one you love and hold me like no one else ever could.

Believe in me as i do you and stand by me while we both make it through."

"Tell me, tell me that you love me. Show me, show me that you will be there. Heal me, heal my sorrow and show me the light."

"I woke up early this morning, with the light shining on my face. I could tell it was going to be a good day, but it didn't go my way, much to my dismay."

"Seek balance in all that you are. Extrovert as must as you go inwards. Know, but within this knowing know that you know very little. Remain in stillness while moving in strides."

"She takes hold of your eyes, shes got you hypnotised, you are memorised."

"Why do we seem to compromise?"

"I would prefer to give you away than have you taken away"

"The physical balance that i find within my body provides the environment for mental and emotional balance."

" Trust but don't get deceived. Be kind but allow for it not to be abused. Be content within the constant striving for improvement. Be harsh with your gentleness. Be realistic in your dreaming. Be active in your lethargy. be slow in your strides."

"Once you have accomplished your goal. Once there is nothing left to do... What is there left to strive for once what you have visioned has been gained?

So take your time, enjoy the process, enjoy the details in all of your efforts."

"You wont give me the chance to restore you, why don't you take any one else's point of view?

You pretend at your weakest that everything is fine, how is that you expect me to read your mind?

You hide behind your smile but if only you knew. I know you better than you know yourself because i can see the whole view, from the outsiders point of view."

"We are all dying, we are all lost and no one, even ourselves, can tell us how and when to stop.

Practice the things you preach and take a look at yourself before you try to fix me."

"It all comes back to you in the end. Deep down we already know this. Stand up and fake it, beat your demons and make it.

In the end it all come back to you, everything comes back to you, so tell me what are you going to do?"

"You make me feel that i can fly, you take me on this natural high."

"Be firm in yourself. Let nothing or nobody shake you. "

"Appreciate the good times but don't forget and make sure you reflect on the bad for this is where the most of your lessons are learned."

"She will make you her hero if you treat her right, she will give you her pride if she knows it feels right."

"She just wants to be loved. To her,That's all. That's it. That's everything."

"Life. Enjoy the gift become absorbed in her. You are a human, so be."

"Applaud yourself, you have realised you are Human."

"Just go with it, just roll with it."

"You are the beat of my heart, the blink of my eyes, the air in my lungs."

"No one, even you can criticise me like me."

"I take it all back when i am calm."

"Disregard me, as if you didn't ever know me."

"Save you from yourself, save her from herself, save him from himself, save me from myself."

"See what I became from you loving me."

"I will never forget you, Ill never regret you. All that we've been through.

Things we've been through that no one else knew, ill remember you. My words to you "thank you."

"Sometimes its tough to see. Its a struggle, almost suffocating at times. Sometimes it hard to know whats right. Know that I feel this way also."

"Listen to your intuition, its been there since the beginning."

"Tell me that i am ugly and watch your words not shake me. Tell me i'm mean and watch me not believe you.

Tell me i'm selfish and watch me not see your point of view. Tell me i'm ordinary and watch me stand firm in knowing i'm extraordinary"

"I'm no fool i just get lost sometimes."

"I'm not indecisive, I just adapt."

"I'm not alone, just at times i get lonely."

"I'm not trouble, I just want to be free."

"Know who you are. Know what you represent."

"Reach and strive, show the world who you are. You can make them listen, you can make a difference.

Know it will be difficult, know you will make enemies on the way. But stay on course, stay focused, without giving a fuck of what they have to say."

"When i'm down I try not to take anyone else with me."

"Be happy with who you are. Embrace all of your flaws. Know that you are a work in progress, something imperfect striving for its own perfection.

Make efforts to understand yourself, the way your mind works.

Be shameless, embrace your learning, embrace your journey."

"Let your life sail with the wind and not fight against it. Let your experiences come and go as they please. Lay on your back and allow the current to take you where it wants to take you."

"I want you to feel pain, the pain of loosing one you Love. Its necessary to appreciate having them as long as you did."

"Buy the ticket, Take the ride."

"For every moment of triumph, for every instance of beauty, many souls must be trampled."

"Freedom is something that dies if not used."

Hunter S. Thompson

"Follow your Bliss."

"Find a place inside where there is Joy. And the joy will burn out the pain."

"A hero is someone who has given his or her life for something bigger than oneself."

"I don't believe that people are looking for the meaning of life s much as they are looking of the experience of being alive."

"The cave you fear to enter is the treasure that you seek"

"You must be willing to let go of the life we planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us."

"Life has no meaning, each of us has meaning and we bring it to life. It is a waste to be asking the question when you are the answer."

"It is a privilege of a lifetime of being who you are."

Joseph Campbell.

"People will do anything, no matter how absurd, to avoid facing their own souls."

"The difference between a good life and a bad life is how well you walked through the fire."

"Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to understanding ourselves."

"I am not what happened to me. I am what i chose to become."

"In each of us there is another whom we do not know."

"Who looks outside dreams, who looks inside awakes."

"If the oath before you is clear, its probably someone else's."

"We meet ourselves time and time again in a thousand disguises on the path of life."

Carl Jung.

"One day, in retrospect, the years of struggle will strike you s the most beautiful."

"One is very crazy when in Love."

Sigmund Freud.

"Being must be felt. It cant be thought."

"To complain is always non-acceptance of what is."

"Realise deeply that the present moment is all you ever have."

"To Love is to recognise yourself in another."

"Always say yes to the present moment, say yes to now."

"You are the universe, expressing itself as a human for a little while."

Eckhart Tolle.

"Do every act of your life as if it was your last."

"Our life is what our thoughts make it."

"Be happy for a moment. This moment is your life."

"If it is not right, don't do it. If it is not true, don't say it."

"Change your thoughts and you will change your world."

Marcus Aurelius.

"Take it easy, don't let the sound of your own wheels make you crazy."

" We may loose and we may win, though we will never be here again."

Glenn Frey.

"Beauty begins the moment you decide to be yourself."

Coco Chanel.

"I don't go by the rule book. I lead from the heart, not the head."

Princess Diana.

"I tried to drown my sorrows but they learned how to swim."

"I am my own muse, the subject i know best, the subject i want to better."

"I want to be inside your darkest everything."

"Take a lover who maybe looks at you like you are Magic."

Frida Kahlo.

"Be something you love and understand."

"All you need is in your soul."

L.S.

" Meet me in the country for a day, We'll be happy And we'll dance."

Tom Johnston.

" Hope you got your things together, Hope you are quite prepared to die."

John Fogerty.

"Its all wrong, but its alright."

Eric Clapton.

"When Love is not Madness it is not love."

Pedro Calderon de Barca.

"You only live once, but if you do it right once is enough."

Mare West.

"Thank you for the Tragedy - I need it for my Art."

Kurt Cobain.

"Do all things with Love"

"Noone has ever measured, Not even Poets, how much the heart can hold."

Zelda Fitzgerald.

"Sometime good things fall apart, so better things can come together."

"Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius, and its better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring."

"We Should all start to live before we get old. Fear is stupid & so are regrets."

"Keep smiling, because life is a beautiful thing and there is so much to smile about."

"A girl knows her limits but a wise girl knows she has none."

"Its better to be hated for what you are than loved for what you are not."

Marilyn Monroe.